With permission, I am sharing a few of comments sent privately to me by friends who are reading this blog...your comments help me process and understand. With love, J.
From MKH: I think it's important that you made a decision to not put your kids through an abusive childhood; just imagine what a strong message you sent by getting out of the situation you were in. As someone on the outside looking in I do believe he did what he did on your birthday to be a forever reminder... I can understand his wife not wanting to acknowledge that because in a warped sense it undermines her importance to him. I think it literally "killed" him to see you happy and strong without him. Just a guess. He certainly didn't have the last word and I believe that this will be the hardest birthday but will only get easier as time goes on. I think it was very profound and says volumes about you that you would rather live the last night 100 times rather than the night in 2006 once. Since I, too, grew up in an abusive household I can relate to that so well. You always have been and always will be totally AMAZING and no one can take that away from you!! Once again, Happy Happy Birthday! And no, do not change the date of celebration!
From LMH: I'm glad you don't have to live those moments again either. Hopefully through Shawn's death the cycle will be broken. Your kids won't think that is normal and how relationships should be. You are strong and an excellent example for them.
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