Life brings many changes in 3 years - and the need to write therapeutically "they" tell me.
The father of my two beautiful children, the man who I spent many times of joy with, the man who caused me great fear and pain...yes, that one.
He took his own life on my 40th Birthday, August 29, 2011.
A last statement from him, no doubt.
I've spent the past year ignoring my own feelings of grief - the sadness, the disbelief, the anger, the confusion as I helped my sweet daughter work through her own pain.
No surprise that this ostrich-like approach to my feelings has resulted in occasional bubbles rupturing to the surface.
I went to my therapist - the one who I had left the last three sessions thinking, "This woman does not LIKE me." (only to tell myself, "How pathetic is THAT?? Oh, boo-hoo, even my therapist doesn't like me"). And this time I left in tears feeling like a total failure.
Soooo...time for everyone's favorite chore - finding a new therapist. Ugh!
So maybe you, my readers, whoever you are will be my therapist for now. If you are reading, please let me know.
In peace,
J~
1 comment:
Still here. :-)
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